CrossLight

Well, my blog has a title – “Living in the CrossLight.”  I chose this following my prayer time in the sanctuary early one morning.  As I sat there, the early morning sun was pouring through our beautiful stained-glass window.  The overhead lights were not on and the room filled with brilliant color.  As the colors poured over me, I was showered with God’s love.  I was profoundly reminded of all the times I have sat in sanctuaries throughout my life and experienced God’s unconditional love.

As a teenager and young adult, I spent many hours sitting on the sanctuary floor of Central Christian Church in Kettering.  In the front of the sanctuary hung a very large, beautiful wooden cross.  I would stare up at this cross, pray, meditate and experience moments of love and grace.  On several occasions while praying I would begin to see in my mind’s eye beautiful colors radiating from center of the cross.  In these moments, I knew God was sharing with me intimately.  I treasure these moments deep within my heart.

During my ministry with FCC-Wilmington, OH, my times in the sanctuary were different.   There was no longer a large cross to meditate upon.  Trying one day to get my prayer rhythm, I laid down on a pew and looked up at the ceiling, and there it was — the cross!  The architecture of the room created a cross that wrapped the room like a beautiful ribbon on a gift.  In that moment, I felt God’s arms wrap around me like the cross was wrapping around the room.  Again, I found the place where my heart and God’s heart found one another.

In late 2005, I began the discernment process to follow a new call in ministry.  I was in discussions with FCC-Middletown.  There were exchanges of ministry profiles, a phone interview, and lots of prayer.  I was confused and bewildered.  But, God kept pulling my attention toward Middletown.  Mark and I drove around town, and I was still perplexed.  The search committee called me to come for an interview.  I remember that day like it was yesterday.  It was the day after my 40th birthday, I put in a full day in Wilmington, picked Corey and Collin up after school, fed them dinner, dropped them off at basketball practice and then headed down I-75 toward Exit 32.  I pulled in the parking lot with a knot of nerves in my throat.  It was so large I didn’t think I could swallow.  I got out of my van and began my journey into the church.  I was greeted by Cliff Thompson and Bob Wolfe.  As we walked through the Narthex/Lobby, my eye was caught — caught by bright, beautiful light.  I turned my head as we continued our journey toward the Memorial Room, and then I saw it.  I saw the cross with brilliant light surrounding it.  I knew in that moment, I was home.

It was the cross that God had shown me so many years before in Kettering.  The knot in my throat dissolved.  I was home.  Our ministry together officially began in February of 2006.

Now, after 7 1/2 years, I’m heading out on sabbatical.  Yesterday during my prayer time in the sanctuary, I realized that it would be three months before I would have this opportunity again.  I was filled with the strangest feeling.  No words come to explain it.  I sat there and soaked up the CrossLight filled with God’s Spirit and Love.  I carry it, along with all of you, in my heart.  I look forward with excitement to my sabbatical journey and my continued faith journey Living in the CrossLight!

with love, Laureen 🙂